Rabbi Shaya's Thoughts

Bring to them or come to me

Wednesday, November 24, 2021 - 3:02 PM

Listen now to this dream, which I have dreamed: Behold, we were binding sheaves in the midst of the field, and behold, my sheaf arose and also stood upright, and behold, your sheaves encircled [it] and prostrated themselves to my sheaf: So, his brothers said to him, "Will you reign over us, or will you govern us?"

The verses above are from the famous biblical dialogue between Joseph and his brothers, found in this week’s Torah portion, Vayeishev. Joseph innocently shares his dream with his brothers, while they think that all he wants is power and prestige. The story does end with Joseph becoming Viceroy of Egypt and the brothers bowing down to Joseph.

Let’s take a moment and zoom in to the nuance of the verse where it says, “binding sheaves.” This is the translation of the Hebrew words, M’almim Alumim. Why do we translate the verse to mean that they were binding sheaves of wheat in the field versus collecting wheat sheaves and putting them into sacks? Perhaps the sheaf that stood upright was a single sheaf, not a whole bundle. How do we make sense out of this story?

One principle that we should always take from a dream is that it appears to teach us a lesson. This dream in particular is meant to teach each and every one of us a lesson, not just Joseph and his brothers.

Collecting loose wheat is a challenging job, but not a very difficult job. On the other hand, trying to tie loose stalks of wheat together in large bundles so that they don’t fly away is a very difficult job to do. Yet, the reward is great. First of all, they will not move in the wind so easily; in addition, they are tied together well. This will keep them together and there will be very little waste since you are gathering and tying the wheat right there in the field. (If you dragged them to a general space to bag, you can lose a great amount of wheat on the way.)

The lesson that we can take into our life is clear: When we have the opportunity to help someone, go to them. Don’t wait until they come to you for help, since by that point much can be lost. Seek them out; this way you will preserve more energy, they will come out stronger, and in the end, more good will come out of it for everyone.

Chanukah is around the corner. The message of Chanukah is to bring more light into the world by lighting our candles in the open for others to see. We don’t wait to bring people into our home, we bring the light of Chanukah to them.

Joseph taught this message to his siblings and eventually to all of Egypt. With time, the Jewish people, since the story of Chanukah, are spreading this message to the world.

This Chanukah you can help by taking part in our Chanukah events. One event will on Wednesday evening, December 1 at 6:00pm, (see info. below) and the second community wide program will be on Sunday, December 5 at 3:00pm. (see info. Below).

Shabbat Shalom and Happy Chanukah!

Honoring Your Parents

Sunday, November 21, 2021 - 7:29 PM

One can argue that one of the most rewarding, and yet at the same time most challenging, things in life can be to honor our parents. When our relationship is good, when we are young and healthy, and when our parents are fun to be around, yes, we can honor them. Not only can we, we want to! However, there can be times when we might want to do our own thing and just ignore their “sage advice.” Which is why it is a bit difficult for us to understand why we learn the age of Bar Mitzvah from a story of two thirteen-year-old boys who do NOT look to their dad for advice.

In this week’s Torah portion, Vayishlach, we read about the story of how Shimon and Levi attack the people of Shechem after their sister Dina was violated. Jacob, their father, was not happy about their actions since he felt that they made a deal with the people and they didn’t honor it. The interesting thing we learn from this incident is the age of Bar Mitzvah. How can we learn from Shimon and Levi, who were disrespectful to their father, that the appropriate age to become Bar Mitzvah is at this point in one's life? Could we not have found a better story to have learned from?

Let’s take a closer look at this incident. What did Shimon and Levi do? They wanted to make the world a better place. They wanted to put an end to inappropriate behavior. Their intentions were to help their sister, and to teach a lesson to those around them that promiscuous behavior was not going to be tolerated. Part of this basic idea includes honoring one’s parents. In this case, they felt taking matters into their own hands was their duty.

After the giving of the Torah at Mount Sinai another aspect of “honoring your mother and father” was added onto this basic concept, and we are commanded that honoring one’s parents is a virtue in its own right. Whether we see it as a “value” or not is irrelevant. We honor our parents not only because it is the right thing to do, but we do so mainly because G-d told us to.

We learn two interesting lessons: The age of Bar Mitzvah from Shimon and Levi since they acted with the intention to make the world a better place. This is a virtue in its own right. In addition, we learn that that is not enough. We still have to grow up and learn to honor our parents even if we don’t understand why we should, and even if we don’t agree with everything they tell us to do (or not to do).

Growing Your Business

Thursday, November 11, 2021 - 10:08 AM

One of the beauties of mom-and-pop shops is that they are attentive to their customers. They offer that personal touch—for example, they know the names of their customers and their life stories, etc. The challenge comes when a business starts to grow. How do you scale up and not lose that personal touch? How do you keep your heimish environment and not become too corporate as you become more professional, as is necessary in order to remain organized?

This can be a huge challenge for some.

We see that, Jacob, our patriarch, had this challenge as well. He started off as a simple shepherd. All that he had were some sheep. Then, over time, he accrued many sheep, and became very wealthy. In this week’s Torah portion Vayeitzei, we learn how he traded some of his sheep for work helpers as well as cattle. But when it came time to send gifts to his brother, Esau, he sent him all different kinds of gifts, and only at the end of the list of gifts does it mention sheep as well. So we see that he “moved up” the ladder from being a simple shepherd who only dealt with sheep, to a very successful businessman.

Did Jacob lose his touch, or did he maintain his humility?

The commentators point out that from the nuances of the verses, we learn a powerful lesson.

By way of introduction, the Midrash points out that we serve G-d in the same manner as children behave for their father, and similarly, as sheep who follow their shepherd. Of course, children and sheep are not the same, and that is the point that the Midrash is making.

Jacob started off dealing with sheep, sheep being a metaphor for the way sheep follow where they are told to go. Total subjugation to the shepherd. For Jacob, it was total subjugation to G-d. Jacob did exactly what G-d wanted him to do. Yet, as he got older, he wanted to internalize these teachings. He didn’t want to just move through life like a sheep; he wanted to become a servant, a helper, or more like others and understand why and what he was here to do. So he “moved up” the ladder of life. He learned, he studied, he questioned, he debated. As he started to understand the deeper meaning of G-dliness and of what G-d wanted him to accomplish in this world, he still maintained his humble spirit. He never forgot that in the end, it is all about the personal touch.

As we scale up in life, whether at work or in our personal life, we must always keep in mind our humble beginnings. Just as Jacob did.

What Makes Jews Tick?

Friday, November 5, 2021 - 9:50 AM

The phenomenon that Jews are exceptionally successful in their fields of expertise, beyond their percentage points, is something that has piqued the interest of academics, angered anti-Semites, and given pride to Jews over the years. However, we do have to ask the question, is this just a fluke of nature? Or is it many years of nurturing? Perhaps it is more than that—a blessing from G-d.

In this week’s Torah portion, Toldot, G-d’s blessing for Isaac is that together with Rebekah, they should be fruitful and multiply. The simple interpretation of the verse is that they should have many children. They only had two, Jacob and Esau. What then, does the verse mean? The Aramaic translation of the verse is that they should “expand” (as a deer expands its body when it runs). Rashi, the classic commentator, picks up on this translation and says that we don’t count our offspring by numbers only, but by their accomplishments.

The lesson for us is that we are not limited by just being “one person”—we can expand our influence by what we accomplish in this world. The more positive things we do with our time, the more influence we can have. Think about the deer—not only does it move quickly and expand its body as it does so, it can also cover a lot of ground. Similarly, if we just stretch ourselves a little bit more, maybe even out of our comfort zone, then we, too, can accomplish so much more.

So G-d’s blessing to Isaac that he would expand his offspring meant not only in quantity but in quality, taught us that all we have to do is put in more effort. The more we put in, the more we get out of it.