The other day I was talking to someone about their marriage and they told me that for them it was “love at first sight.” Obviously, they didn’t just trust that instinct and get married the next day; they dated and debated whether or not to trust that first instinct, but in their heart, they just knew it. If you read Malcolm Gladwell’s book, Blink, he talks about this concept of just knowing something, then questioning ourselves and doing all the research necessary, and then circling back to what we already knew.
The first time—that we know of—where this idea is mentioned, is in this week’s Torah portion. We learn about the Jews’ response to G-d when He asked them if they wanted to receive the Torah. The Jews’ response was “Na’ase V’nishma” meaning “we will do, and we will listen.” First, they accepted everything with complete faith. Then they went to learn and understand why. G-d did give them the Commandments, not only commandments that are based on faith alone, but commandments that are called Mishpatim, common-sense laws—ones that we can understand, ones that we can connect with.
You see, G-d wants us to base our relationship with Him on a concept like that of “love at first sight.” A “faith-based” relationship. Just “trust in G-d” as it says on U.S. currency. However, in order to have a deeper and more meaningful relationship, we must nurture it. We must study it. We should want to delve into it by asking the difficult questions of what, why, and how. What is this G-d? What is it that makes up His world? How do things happen? Why does He want us to do this mitzvah but not perform other acts, etc. The more we understand, the closer we feel, just like in any relationship. Love at first sight is nice, but if you don’t date the person and get to know them, what does the love really mean?
Faith in G-d is only useful if we educate ourselves. However, education does not replace our faith, it strengthens it. The more we learn about G-d, the more we learn that there is more to learn. That is why even in this week’s Torah portion where the primary mitzvot are practical, reason-oriented mitzvot, we still have sprinkled throughout the portion mitzvot that are beyond logic, so that we are reminded that our relationship with G-d always needs faith at its base.
Just as in any relationship, we try to understand and connect using logic, but beneath it all, we need a strong foundation of love, a love that is based not on logic alone, not on looks, but on a connection of two souls becoming one. When that happens, even when logic dictates otherwise, a couple can survive any storm.
Same with our relationship with G-d. Make it a meaningful one, an educated one. And at the same time always stand ready to say: Na’ase V’nishma, we do and we will listen.
Shabbat Shalom.