There is a well-known saying: “If you love chicken that much, then don’t eat it.” In other words, you eat it because it’s not the chicken that you love, it is yourself that you love, and you love the
way chicken tastes. However, if you actually loved the chicken itself, you would not eat it. Obviously, this idea makes our lives very complicated. For example, if I say I love you, does that
mean that I love myself and I am selfish and I only love you to satisfy my own needs? Can I love another person without any ulterior motives? Is it even possible to say “love you” without the
“I?” Are we splitting hairs here?
The reason we should be thinking about this question is because of this week’s Torah portion, Eikev, where Moses tells us that we cannot bribe G-d with our good deeds. But then the Midrash
tells us not to worry, because G-d Himself makes an exception and does take bribes in one case, and one case only, when it comes to Teshuva, repentance.
Are we splitting hairs here?
Well, what is the process of repentance? There is the person who sinned and there is the sin itself. Within the world of sins, there are sins that can be rectified (example: an object that was
stolen can be returned), and there are sins that cannot be easily fixed (example: the stolen object was destroyed and can no longer be returned).
When we talk about the idea of “repentance,” are we referring to the person who sinned and do we mean to say that they have to regret their action, while their sin can continue to exist? Or do
we need to make sure that the sin itself is eradicated from the world as well?
To clarify the question at hand, what if a person regrets their actions but doesn’t do anything about it when they could? For example, they stole goods and had the opportunity to return
them, but they don’t. Is their regret meaningless, or just incomplete? How about if what they stole is impossible to return since it was destroyed; does that mean that they have no chance
for repentance ever, since it is impossible to rectify their action by returning the stolen goods as they no longer exist? If so, what is their path to return?
This is what the Midrash means when it says that G-d takes bribes. G-d knows what is in one’s heart. Let’s put the technicalities on the side. Sure, if we can get to the finish line in our effort to repent, we should. However, if we don’t, it doesn’t mean that we have not started. G-d who knows what is going on in our hearts and minds, is bribed by those thoughts and feelings of
regret and repentance. So even if we didn’t finish the process, the fact that we started is so meaningful to Him, that he changes His mind and forgives us in advance!
Just like a bribe can change a judge’s mind, so too, can our Teshuva. Even just starting the process can change G-d’s perspective about us, and He will look favorably toward us.
Don’t bribe G-d with your deeds. Bribe Him with your heart.
ב"ה