Chanukah is a time to give gelt (that is money, not the chocolate coins) to our children. In more modern times, this tradition turned into giving gifts. This modern concept can cause jealousy between children and their peers. It is important to prepare our children to not be jealous of their friends if the friends receive more gifts than they do, and that if our children receive more, they should not flaunt them in front of their friends, either—especially not in front of those who could misinterpret a gift the wrong way.
Let me explain.
In this week’s Torah portion, we learn about the famine that hit the Middle East, from Egypt to Israel and beyond. Everyone was going down to Egypt to buy food from the young Viceroy to the Pharaoh, whom we know as Joseph. Included in the throngs of people were Jacob and his sons, Joseph’s brothers. The Torah tells us the story of how Joseph gave his family more than enough food to last for a long time. Jacob, however, felt that they should return to Egypt a second time – knowing there were dangers involved. He didn’t want his enemies (the children of Ishmael and Esau) to be jealous—they could potentially assume that the reason Jacob and his family were not returning to Egypt was because they had more than enough food, when in actuality, they really just had enough to last for a while.
Jacob understood that he could not change the inherent hatred that the descendants of Ishmael and Esau had toward him and his children. However, he did know that he could preempt it by a proper response that not everything has to be advertised.
From this story we learn to be sensitive to other people’s thoughts and feelings. Not only to know how your friends think and feel about you, but even how your enemies think and feel about you. It is important not to make people jealous for no reason, especially when it can be avoided.
In this season of giving, whether it be a gift of money or an item or even an experience, it is important not to compare it to others. Just look at what we have and be happy with what we have in our lives.
Happy Chanukah and Shabbat Shalom